Writing fail of epic proportions

[bradspyjamas]

When will I learn that a draft does not a finished work make? 
I started writing The Weight of Knowledge over two months ago and posted the first chapter only when I'd written all three chapters and finished editing 1 & 2.  I posted those two pretty quickly in succession, certain that I'd be able to iron the wrinkles out of chapter 3 in good time.
Yeah and oh look, flying pigs!
I just can't make it read properly and it doesn't fit with the first two chapters at all. I know part of it is that I'm working with really triggery material (describing how John feels when he realises he's put on weight, facing up to why he was able to hide it from himself, why Sherlock didn't mention anything, how he feels about it, what his own weight gain means to him and how he feels about John's) and that makes me nervous in case I upset someone (me not included although it hasn't been easy writing it - which was half the purpose in the first place). 
Then there's the damn writing style I was so eager to try out in the first place - works brilliantly for chapters 1 & 2 but it's strangling what I'm trying to do in 3, making things sounds flippant when they really shouldn't.
I've re- written it so many times I want to scream and kizzia has beta'd and even written her own version in an attempt to help me out (which is the one I'm currently playing with as she somehow managed to get all the good bits from my versions and string them together in her own inimitable fashion) but I still grates on my nerves and I refuse to post something I'm not happy with.
I just want it gone! 
Do I post and be damned or spend today trying to fix it (kizzia has offered moral support via Skype)? Answers on a postcard please :)

Comments

Re: Things to Try

[azriona.livejournal.com]

Ah, but no one gets laid in British Gov't. Fics don't get read unless someone gets laid in them, usually several times, possibly with lots of angst before and snuggles after. I've long since reconciled myself to this fact. :)

Re: Things to Try

[bradspyjamas.livejournal.com]

I think it's a fandom thing - Kiz has a Merlin wip that's amazing (although I think she might walk away from that tbh) and there is no sex whatsoever yet she's got loads of hits and people begging for updates.
Anyway, I read fics sans sex all the time (although I'm apparently incapable of writing them!)